Sexpert Advice

Author: The Love BoutiqueTM |

Blog by The Love Boutique

Sexpert Advice

Sexpert Advice is here! It’s time to learn more about Anal Sex, Female Ejaculation & Sex Toys

1. What is Anal Sex? | 2. What is Female Ejaculation? | 3. What are Sex Toys Made Of? | 4. How To Use A We-Vibe?

SEXPERT ADVICE ON: What is Anal Sex?

Sexpert advice on Anal Sex might assist you in making an educated decision. There’s much, much more to anal sex than just intercourse! Millions of men and women, straight, gay, and bisexual, have experimented with anal play. Nerve endings fill the Anus. Pelvic muscles are also connected to the anus. Did you know it even pulsates rhythmically during orgasm and there are many ways to stimulate the anus erotically? Many enjoy a finger or two inserted and gently rotated during intercourse or masturbation. Sex toys – butt plugs, anal beads, and anal toys like the anal twist or smooth anal probe can penetrate further than a finger. Anal sex is just one of many sexual positions that a couple can add to their routine. If this is something you or your partner has always wanted to try, here are a few helpful hints to keep things fun and sexy.

  1. Communicate before you get started.
    Make sure you are both interested in trying Anal Sex. This is very important. Communication builds trust, which can make anal sex a very pleasurable and sexy activity.
  2. Take your time.
    Taking things slowly can ease the pressure for both partners when trying something new. And if at first things don’t quite work, it’s fine to try again later – during the same lovemaking session or another night.
  3. Relax.
    Relaxing is sometimes easier said than done. The person on the receiving end might want to have an orgasm before getting started. This could help them to unwind.
  4. Practice.
    Yes, practice does make perfect. The person receiving can practice doing kegel exercises – that is, tightening and loosening the anal sphincter muscles – at any time before engaging in anal sex. (Doing a kegel is like pretending you are holding back gas or a bowel movement, and then letting go. Repeat this five to ten times in a row, in sets of three to have a maximum effect).
  5. Work up to it.
    The inserter can start with a well-lubricated finger before using a penis, or anal toys to penetrate.
  6. Use a condom.
    Many STDs, including HIV and hepatitis, can be transmitted through anal sex. Play safe, use a condom.
  7. Lube, lube, and more lube.
    Lubricant is vital to anal sex. When you think you’ve put on enough, go for a little more. And if you’re using condoms, make sure you use the correct type of lube. Silicone lubricants stay slicker longer. However, our sexpert advice recommends a thicker water-based lubricant like Anal Lube. Perhaps also try a relaxing spray like Adventure Anal Relaxing Serum.
  8. Breathe and communicate.
    Breathing helps make the insertion easier. Talking helps you each know what feels good and what you want more of, and what isn’t working quite as well and you want to be stopped.
  9. Try various positions.
    Side by side, or spooning, is often the best for beginners. It gives the receiver more control over the pace and movement. Many couples also try missionary position so they can see each other and rear-entry or doggie style for maximum thrusting.
  10. Figure out what you like…and ask your partner to repeat it.


Many people worry about it being dirty. However, the rectum actually has very little fecal matter stored in it. Perhaps before you get started, try an enema. It is, however, common for the bottom to feel the urge to have a bowel movement afterward.

Here is our sexpert advice on personal lubricants. Thicker lubricants work better than thinner ones for anal sex. The anal tissues are very delicate and prone to tearing. These lubricants protect the tissues better during thrusting. Also, use plain condoms rather than the flavored ones, which could cause burning. Before using a toy examine it to make sure they are no rough edges that could scratch or tear the delicate lining. In addition, do the same for the fingers. Keep fingernails short and filed smooth. Keep them free of ridges. Lastly, sexy addition to anal sex is for the receiver to stimulate him or herself while the other partner is thrusting. Simultaneous orgasm is not only possible but is easier during this activity!

  • Some ask are there any long-term effects of anal sex?
  • Some ask how should my partner and I start the experience of anal sex?

No, there aren’t any long-term effects of anal sex, although many people think that there could be a problem of anal stretching. There have been anal sex studies done. These confirmed that there is no loss of muscle tone or the ability to contract the anal sphincter muscles with regular anal sex.

Here are some tips to help get you started:

  1. Begin by using a finger or a small sex toy (anal plug). Use plenty of water-based lubricants. Lay the finger horizontally across the anus. The receiver needs to gently push out as if she/he is having a bowel movement, so his/her partner can pop a finger in. When the receiver is ready, put a condom on with lots and lots of water-based lubricant. Thicker lubes work best because they cushion the delicate anal tissues.
  2. Have the receiver take a deep breath before insertion. The receiver may want to have an orgasm first in order to fully relax. Talk to your partner about the pace, depth, and rhythm as you’re penetrating.
  3. Side-by-side or spooning is a good position to start with. Face-to-face and rear entry are other common positions as you become more comfortable.
  4. There has to be trust between partners to have anal sex successfully. Communicate your needs and ask your partner about his or hers so that anal sex becomes a pleasurable addition to your sexual repertoire.

Extra: If your partner is a woman, be sure not to go back and forth between anal and vaginal penetration because it can cause infection, a helpful tip for this is starting with a few condoms on to begin with and when you go to switch between anal and vaginal just take off the top condom.


What it is:

Anal stimulation can trigger the same nerve pathways as a deep-vaginal orgasm, so it will feel similar.

Want one?

With your fingers or his, start with light strokes just outside the anal opening, moving in slow circles. If you want penetration, relax and have him insert one or two well-lubricated fingers about two inches into the rectum. If he’s using his penis, have him go very slowly. To avoid spreading bacteria, he should wash up and change the condom before touching you again. If using a toy be sure to use lots of lube and start off slowly, change the tempo to the speed you like. Soon you’ll be shivering with delight.


Butt Plugs – these toys come in many different sizes and colors. However, they have the same shape. They are narrow at the top, thickest in the middle, and narrow at the bottom. These toys have a flared base. The base stops the toy from getting sucked up and stuck in the anus. Plugs stay in one place. Hence, they do not slide in and out. You can train and relax your anal muscles using butt plugs.

Vibrating Butt Plugs – these toys can give a feeling of fullness, with inner vibration that creates erotic and exciting sensations. They have the same shape as mentioned above however, these come with a multi-speed vibrator.

Anal Beads – these beads can come in all sizes and colors, from small to very large. Most often a cord strings them together. If the cord is cotton, do not use them more than once. Cotton traps bacteria, even after washing. To use anal beads, insert a well-lubed string of beads into the anus and during orgasm slowly pull them out.

Anal Probes – these toys can come in vibrating or non-vibrating and some come with mounds or a slender then wider shaft which allows the anus to expand or contract while sliding in and out.

Inflatables – with these toys, you can increase the pressure and therefore the pleasure. Simply use the handheld pump after the plug is in place. When using during intercourse an inflatable plug fills the rectum and can create a tighter feeling vagina for your partner.

Anal Kits – these include different sizes and shapes for your anal play, as well as vibrating and non-vibrating components.

SEXPERT ADVICE ON: What is Female Ejaculation?

Need more sexpert advice on Female Ejaculation? Believe it or not, the female orgasm and female ejaculation were unknown until relatively recently. Back in the 1800s, if a woman was feeling aroused, her husband would take her to the doctor. And, yes, all doctors were men in those days. The Doctor would then treat her for “hysterical tension”. Symptoms of this “condition” included irritability, a temperature, and swollen pudenda.

Guess how the doctors treated their female patients with this condition? They prescribed masturbation! However, the patient was not allowed to do this. This act was deemed to be unhealthy and would rot the mind! Most often, stimulating the woman’s genitals until she orgasmed was performed by either a midwife or sometimes by the doctor himself. The husband and wife would then return back to their 19th-century domestic bliss.


Female Ejaculation? You mean women can ejaculate like men? Yes, we can!!

Many of us women are simultaneously curious and timid about the subject. Did you know that many women ejaculate already without actually knowing they are doing it?

It can be an intimidating concept to imagine gushing crazy amounts of fluid when you orgasm, but it can open you up to a new level of sexuality and can offer you the wildest, deepest, wettest orgasms ever!

As you might have guessed by now, the g spot is a big player in squirting. In fact, female ejaculation is even sometimes referred to as g spot ejaculation. Apply firm pressure to stimulate the G-spot. For this reason, our sexpert advice includes using a g spot toy that is harder in texture.

It’s helpful to know that some women experience ejaculation due to stimulation to the g spot alone; others can ejaculate with clitoral stimulation and others do best with a combination of both. However, the g spot (with or without direct stimulation) is the key area as it becomes engorged and swells when aroused and thus sets in motion the release of ejaculate fluid.

Also, you still might be wondering what the substance of female ejaculate is made of, as well as where it comes from. If you are like most people, you have probably heard that it is just pee, but this is not the case. Although it is released via the urethra – the same tube we release urine from – it is not pee! In fact, many cultures refer to it as sacred female sexual fluid or “amrita.” You might also have heard female ejaculation called squirting orgasm or female cum, but ejaculation and orgasm, although they can happen simultaneously, and usually do, are actually two separate things.

You might be wondering what exactly is this substance of female ejaculate? And if it is released through the urethra but is not urine – which it is not – then what exactly is it?

It is interesting to know that men also release ejaculate through their urethra, the same tube they pee from. In fact, the whole process of female ejaculation is much like the male ejaculation.

Confused at all? Here’s a brief description of the process:

When a woman gets turned on, the whole pelvic area begins to get hot and aroused. The glands that surround your urethra, (called Skene’s paraurethral glands) start to fill up. Sometimes when the g spot gets stimulated; you may feel like you need to pee. Many of these glands cluster to make up the organ known as the beloved g spot. When you feel your g spot get engorged and protrude more into the vagina, it is the organ filling with female ejaculate. The fluid either gets recycled into the bladder and comes out when you pee, or it will be released through your urethra as female ejaculation. At times this can mean a few teaspoons and at others a cup or more!

You still might be wondering – is it urine? Get some sexpert advice! The answer is, NO, it isn’t! It is a fluid that can be either “milky” or clear, which usually has little or no odor or taste, although this can change depending on your diet or where you are in your menstrual cycle. The fluid of female ejaculate is a mixture of glucose, fructose, some hormones, and acids known as PSA and PAP, with here and their traces of urine.


Although you now know a bit more about female ejaculate, many cultures have not only known about it since ancient times but have both celebrated and revered it. In fact, it is known as “Liquor Vitae” in Ancient Rome. “The Third Water” in Taoist traditions. “Waters of Gaia” or “Waters of Life” in many different indigenous cultures. And, is referred to by Tantric or Indian traditions as “Amrita”. In ancient Japan, it was common for women to own “Ejaculation Bowls”. They would capture the flow for use later. How was it used? Female ejaculate is considered by many to be an aphrodisiac. Many ancient cultures considered it to be a health tonic. They believe it has the ability to reverse the aging process. They drink it and make tea out of it.

OK, so even though most of us won’t be making a tea out of female ejaculate, there are a few recommended essential items for your own exploration… Fingers and tongues are excellent, but consider adding a G-Spot vibrator to your bag of tricks. And, because you likely don’t want to have an ejaculation bowl, we recommend you put down a couple of towels.

Here is our Sexpert Advice for women who want to achieve Female Ejaculation:

If you are interested, then this female ejaculation exercise is for you! First, you need to get comfortable touching and stimulating yourself. And, bringing yourself to ejaculation. Leave about 45 minutes to an hour for this female ejaculation exercise. You don’t need much. First, gather some lube. Second, a couple of towels. Third, a small hand mirror. Finally, your favorite dildo or vibrator. You may also want to pee before starting. In particular, so that later during the exercise, you know you are not peeing. You will, in fact, be experiencing female ejaculation. During this female ejaculation exercise, feel free to use a small hand mirror to see what you look like touching yourself and ejaculating.

  1. Relax and get comfortable. Take a hot shower or bath. It’s really important with female ejaculation that you be relaxed and open. After all, you are letting something out!
  2. Set yourself up in a cozy and comfortable location, with several layers of towels underneath you. You will likely want to be reclining or sitting up – lying down on your back will probably not allow you to reach your g spot.
  3. Begin to touch yourself, using your fingers or a dildo or vibrator – any and all of your favorite techniques to get yourself really hot. You can touch your clitoris, as well as your g spot.
  4. Once you are intensely aroused, take a moment to find and play with your g spot. Reaching your g spot with just your fingers might be hard – it depends on where yours is exactly. To locate yours, take one or two fingers (you might want to use lube) and insert them inside yourself, palm up, fingers hooked, and feel around about 1½ inches in, on the front wall of your vagina, just above the pubic bone. You will likely find a pea or walnut-sized spot that feels a different texture from the rest of the vagina. Play with this spot, and notice what feels best to you. Also, try using your vibrator or dildo (again with lube) – it can offer much more access and control when playing with your g spot.
  5. You can try the “withdrawing” technique of rubbing the g-spot directly in a series of 5 to 6 repetitions, and then withdraw fully your fingers or the vibrator suddenly; wait about 2-3 seconds and then repeat. This can bring on ejaculation, and you often see this technique used in videos.
  6. If it doesn’t, just keep heading toward orgasm, touching either your clit or g spot (or both), whatever works best for you. Either way, keep noticing the full or watery feeling you are likely experiencing. If you bring yourself to orgasm, rather than stopping, keep touching yourself – see what happens when you go beyond orgasm.
  7. If you feel like you need to pee, you are on the right track – but rather than backing off, push into this feeling. Some need to relax to let the ejaculate come out, but others may find a need to assist with pushing out.
  8. You are there! You are not peeing, you are experiencing female ejaculation! Don’t worry about wetting the area. That is what the towels are for! Just relax, release, and let go.
  9. Take a moment to appreciate your body and its capacity for such immense pleasure, and the amazing experience of female ejaculation. If you didn’t ejaculate this time, don’t worry! Think back on this female ejaculation exercise. Try to recall what felt good. And, what you noticed. Finally, try to remember where you got stuck or blocked, etc. Think of a few things you’ll do differently next time, and then try it again on another day.
  10. Practice does make perfect after all! Experiment with how best to stimulate your g spot. Remember to use firm pressure. Don’t forget that g spot toys can help in many instances.

Sex Accessories Online

SEXPERT ADVICE ON: What are Sex Toys Made Of?


CyberSkin, also known as thermal plastic, is the brand name of a soft elastomer material that mimics the experience of human skin, warm and soft to the touch, yet with a firm underlying texture. Cyberskin or UR3 (Ultra Realistic 3.0) material toys are soft and stretchy, with a velvety texture. Sex toys made of these substances are more durable than latex, but also often carry higher price tags. If your CyberSkin (or equivalent material) ever becomes unpleasantly sticky, just give it a light dusting of cornstarch to restore its original texture. ONLY USE water-based lubricants on these materials like silicone or any petroleum or oil-based lubricant will destroy CyberSkin. Toys made of these materials are extremely porous, so sharing of toys without a condom is not safe.

Sexpert Advice on Care and Lubrication: You should thoroughly clean the sex toys made of these materials between uses, and coat them with a proprietary renewal powder to ensure it retains its lifelike texture. You can also use cornstarch and a soft cloth to keep your sex toys in the best condition. These materials are extremely sensitive. Clean them with warm water and a mild antibacterial solution like Toy Cleaner. Do not use alcohol-based or other types of household cleaner as they will damage the material. After cleaning, pat dry with a lint-free towel and allow your CyberSkin product to air dry before applying renewal powder. This will prevent discoloration and protect your toy when not in use.



Silicone is soft and lifelike, it is hypoallergenic, and it warms up quickly to body temperature. It is non-porous and so is easy to clean with toy cleaner and water. Boil non-vibrating Toys to sterilize them. This includes sterilizing temperatures up to 300 °C (572 °F). Sex toys made of silicone are more expensive than those made of jelly and rubber, but they are particularly durable and will last for years with appropriate care.

Here is our sexpert advice on Care and Lubrication: As with all sex toys, a thorough washing after each use is called for. Use an antibacterial solution like Toy Cleaner, or, as mentioned above, boil or otherwise heat the toy to sterilize it completely. When using lubricants with silicone sex toys it is important that you ONLY USE water-based lubricants like silicone or any petroleum or oil-based lubricant can destroy Silicone toys.


Jelly sex toys are from a mixture of PVC and rubber, resulting in a soft jelly-like texture and feel. Sex toys made from jelly feel reasonably realistic. Jelly often looks translucent. Sometimes it has a rubber odor due to its porous character. Jelly sex toys have one drawback. Phthalates are used to make these types of sex toys. Phthalates are “plasticizers” or softeners added to plastics to make jelly more flexible, more transparent, and allow them to last longer. This material is one of the least expensive substances from which to make a sex toy.

Sexpert Advice on Care and Lubrication: Cleaning a jelly toy is similar to CyberSkin, which is to say use a mild anti-bacterial solution like Toy Cleaner and warm water, taking care to dry the toy and store it in a cool, dry place away from other objects especially other jelly toys. ONLY USE water-based lubricants with jelly toys.



Similar to jelly, the elastomer is a much higher quality. An elastomer is a compound that does not include phthalates. Phthalates are “plasticizers” used to soften PVC vinyl. If the vinyl does not contain any softeners, they are very hard PVC plastic. You can quickly determine the grade of the vinyl and quantity of plasticizers (phthalates) used by the smell. The more odor you smell, the lower the grade and the more phthalates used. Elastomers are a completely different material. They start out soft and have products added to make them harder. There are no residual hardeners. And, there is no latex. This type of material is ideal for manufacturing a variety of textures.

Care and Lubrication: Using a water-based lubricant is best. Especially, with sex toys made from elastomers. In addition, clean them after each use. Use a mild anti-bacterial solution like Toy Cleaner and water.


Many dildos are made from latex rubber. Rubber is not as pliable as silicone or jelly materials. Rubber dildos tend to be very firm and not very lifelike to the touch. If you have no latex allergies, they will serve well through many uses when properly maintained. Like jelly toys, rubber dildos are quite porous. Hence, they require the same soft-touch when cleaning them. And, always use a condom if you share. Rubber dildos can be quite inexpensive.

Sexpert Advice on Care and Lubrication: Cleaning with a soft cloth, Toy Cleaner, and water after each use is mandatory when using a rubber sex toy. Be sure to use a condom if sharing this type of sex toy, and water-based lubricants are best for the long-term health of latex rubber.


(Thermoplastic rubber-TPR) is a polymer blend that has a thermoplastic character. It is hypoallergenic, non-toxic, and phthalate-free. TPR is less porous than Cyberskin. However, it is more porous than Silicone. Therefore, use a condom with sex toys made of TPR. This will prevent the spread of bacteria and other infectious agents.

Sexpert Advice on Care and Lubrication: TPR sex toys should be cleaned with water and antibacterial sex toy cleaners. You cannot sterilize this material by boiling.


Acrylic or Lucite

These materials are as hard as a rock, which doesn’t seem like the ideal texture for a sex toy. However, this firm texture makes acrylic and Lucite perfect for PC muscle-strengthening toys such as Kegel exercisers. This material is also good for prostate-stimulating toys, which many people consider to be dildos, too. Another great thing about these materials: you can boil them without harming them, which means you can share your toys.

Care and Lubrication: These toys may be boiled for sterilization. However, if you are not sharing, a simple bath with Toy Cleaner and water will do. You can use any kind of lubricant with this type of toy. These include silicone-based, water-based, or oil-based types.

Borosilicate Glass

Glass sex toys are commonly made from clear medical grade borosilicate glass. Also known as ”hard glass”. Pyrex is a well-known brand. This material (essentially “lead-free crystal”) is completely non-toxic and will withstand extreme temperatures as well as considerable physical shock without compromising its structural integrity. Glass toys made of borosilicate are completely safe. A properly annealed inch thick piece will withstand up to 3,000 lbs of pressure and extreme heat and cold. Glass dildos are non-porous. You can sterilize these types of toys. This helps prevent infection with reuse or sharing. These types of sex toys are not only durable but also visually appealing, often considered by some to resemble works of art. Glass sex toys are a long-lasting alternative to less expensive toys. You can also warm or chill these toys before use.

Sexpert Advice on Care and Lubrication: These toys may be boiled or otherwise heated for sterilization. However, if you are not sharing your toy then washing with Toy Cleaner and water will do. You can even toss them in the dishwasher! You can use any type of lubricant with this type of toy. This includes silicone-based, water-based, or oil-based.


Sex toys made of chrome alloy and stainless steel are non-porous, easily warmed to body temperature, pleasurable, and beautiful. Steel sex toys will last almost indefinitely if cared for properly.

Sexpert Advice on Care and Lubrication: Stainless steel sex toys need no special precautions. Hence, all are resistant to almost everything including food and beverages. You can or wash in the dishwasher however using Toy Cleaner and water is a safe and easy way to keep your toy disinfected. For lubrication, you can use any type, including water, oil, or silicone-based lubricants.



Take some sexpert advice, the We-Vibe line offers thrills and chills for both partners! The We-Vibe replaces an entire selection of adult toys because of its versatility. It has the power of a large vibrator but is small enough to fit a woman’s internal contours. And, it delivers stimulation directly to the Clitoris and G-Spot. The We-Vibe Chorus has no wires or straps to get in the way or ruin the mood. The We-Vibe fits women anatomically and is so slender and conforming that a penis or dildo can easily fit into the vagina along with the We-Vibe.

Sexpert Advice on how to use:

Wash your We-Vibe Chorus with antibacterial toy cleaner before and after use. Only use water-based lubricants. The flexible “C” shape has two adjustable points to fit your unique body. We-Vibe will easily open to a 120 degree angle. The larger “Clitoral Pad” will nestle in between the labia and against the clitoris. Insert the tapered, slender end into the vagina. Chorus features unique touch-sensitive receptors located beneath the We-Vibe logo. As you play, your movements control the vibrations. Choose from three Touch-sense modes to find your ultimate pleasure. The We-Vibe has a safe silicone exterior and has no smell or taste. Reliable functionality is what you get with this high-performance device.

The G-Spot stimulator has a tapered “teardrop” shape that will naturally hug your G-Spot while you make love. The internal G-Spot vibrator motor will provide the ideal stimulation directly to the G-Spot. And, the pleasure ribs will gently massage the G-Spot when a penis or dildo moves inside the vagina. The We-Vibe’s anatomical shape will fit most women’s internal contours. And, it will naturally and comfortable nestle in and massage the G-Spot.

Insert the smaller G-Spot stimulator into the vagina, the larger “Clitoral Stimulator” pad will flex back to gently hug the clitoris. The labia will conform over and around the We-vibe. The powerful throbbing from the internal vibrator motor will directly stimulate the clitoris with the ideal climactic vibrations. The clitoral pad pleasure waves will provide added physical stimulation to the clitoris when the clitoral pad rubs against you while making love.


Or, while walking around the house. This handy sex toy will always try to stay nestled into the woman’s erogenous zone. The low profile in the vaginal entry area and the We-Vibe’s mirror smooth finish makes it virtually unnoticeable to the man with the exception of the powerful vibrations. Men take pleasure in the experience of a vibrating vagina. And, especially enjoy sharing in their partner’s climactic response to the We-Vibe’s deep and powerful Clitoral and G-Spot vibrations.

Change vibration modes as well as the intensity in the heat of the moment. Chorus’ Squeeze Remote is designed with the most natural human response in mind – the tighter you squeeze, the stronger the vibration gets. Release your grip and the vibration weakens. If you use the 100% waterproof Chorus in the bath or under the shower, please note that the remote control is splashproof, not waterproof.

With the free We-Connect app, you can play and share control of Chorus from anywhere. As well as, create custom vibes and play together with other We-Vibe products. Vibe to music with Beat mode or use Touch mode for real-time control at your fingertips. Convenient and eco-friendly, Chorus is rechargeable with up to 90 minutes of sex play on a single charge. Chorus is powered with AnkorLinch/Bluetooth technology. AnkorLink creates the most stable connection between your We Vibe and the We-Connect App. The Squeeze Remote is the anchor between Chorus and the We-Connect app. You will need to keep it close by whenever you use We-Connect.

Wear a we-vibe secretly under clothes. Try making your next walk in the park or a long commute to work a little more exciting! The We-Vibe is also great for Kegel exercises. The G-Spot vibrations help you to locate Kegel muscles. Flex and release the Kegel muscles to strengthen the vagina. The flexible nature of the We-Vibe gives your muscles something to work against as they contract.